Am I ?

Things changed.. That's how I feel now.

No matter how much I want to see you
No matter how much I want to hear your voice
No matter how much I want feel the warmth of your skin
No matter how much I miss you..

I can't and will never ever to get you first..

Is this going to be forever ?
Can I go with it ?
Am I really ready for this ?

Only Reminds Me Of You

Do you .. ?

We're getting farther away.
We're not as warm as you used to come to my life.

What is wrong ? ..
Who is wrong ? ..

Has the heart changed ? ..

Do you ? ..

Is it too much ?

When loving you and wanted you to be mine
When Hopping on you and want it to be forever
When counting on you that my happiness will be coming from you, always
When I feel so insecure knowing that your past was so beautiful
When realizing that You and I will never be the same.  

Is it too much ?

I'm Waiting

No matter how much I hate this
No matter how much I mad at you
No matter how much tears that fell out

I keep on looking at my phone, and hoping for a mssg notification from you.

Yes, I'm waiting ..

It Hurt's

Knowing that thing's will get to the point when I will not be able to express it again..

Knowing that he can't do anything about it ..

Knowing that I will be back to where I used to be ..

Knowing that I cannot do anything about it and the tears is falling ..

It hurt's ..

💖

And he said "I love you too.."

Is it the right thing .. ?

Rasa itu sudah mulai ada
Keinginan untuk memiliki dia sudah kuat
Cemburu sudah mulai sering datang
Air mata sudah hinggap

Mencintai mu bukan hal yang sulit, tetapi melupakan rasa untuk bisa memiliki mu itu yang belum bisa aku lakukan sampai sekarang ..

Apakah memang ini jalan yang diberikan. Hadiah indah yang tidak ingin aku lepaskan ..

Is that your promise?

" I will grow that happiness for you.."

Another "Damn It" Situation

What is it with falling in love .. I hate it !
I hate the feeling when I miss you and I can't reach you..

The situation when you will always able to reach me when you miss me and I can't do the same ..

Damn it Babe !!

It's Never Enough

When the feeling is there and you know that you will never get more than that.

When I can feel that I am falling in love with you and I can't have it.

When I am fully understand that I will never feel enough even if you are here...

Aku Cemburu

Mengetahui dia ada di sebelah mu, bisa melihat mu dan bersama mu malam ini.

Aku cemburu, dia istri mu

Please ..

Im in love with the colour and smile that you bring into my life. And it's about your time to go back to your own life.

I just want that colours and the smile stay here even when you're not around.

Please..

The Angel Within Him

He's not a prince charming
He's not a model look a like
He's not the popular guy

He's just him with all the funny-truth-dare things he said that bring back all the colors and smile to me. No high expectations, just a hope that after this episodes end, the smile and colors will stay there..

Damn It !

Eh.. aduuhh !!

Kok jadi gini gue ...
Aduuh, jangan dong sar.. He's just being nice to you ..

But ... Damn it !!, no BUT ... You have to forget it !.

Michael Bublé - Close Your Eyes

Happy ?

What makes you happy ?

Who makes you happy ?

Those questions were lingering my head over and over until the beautiful stranger told me, "be thankful for all little things you have now. You will never know what will come to night or tomorrow. by doing it you will be happy".

Comfort Words

Another episodes when a stranger can understand my point of view and kinda telling me that it was not my fault by saying "he was not ready" for the second time.

Another comfort feeling was being offered to me by a beautiful stranger ..

A Beautiful Stranger

Dia, yang dulu gue tau namanya hanya dari group di sosial media yang gue ikuti ..
Dia, yang selalu komen-komen lucu atas postingan di group itu ..
Dia, yang kemudian gue add untuk jadi temen gue di suatu sosial media ..
Dia, yang akhirnya kadang-kadang jadi temen ngobrol sebelum tidur ..
Dia, yang selalu menyapa gue dengan kata "Eh.." dan gue enjoy dengan sebutan itu ..
Dia, yang bisa sangat mengerti keadaan gue.. Karena dia sudah mengalaminya lebih dulu..

I wanna keep it that way, I don't want to know more about him and else .. 
I love the way it is now, a beautiful person with all he had.
A beautiful stranger that comfort me ..
 

Accepting.

Life is what we make it
It cares not what we do

No matter how we fake it
it always sees right through

If you try and lead it
It pushes from behind

If you try and read it
It soon will make you blind

Jut let it free take you
Enjoy life's carefree ride

And know it won't forsake you
If you walk right by its side   ..... Life Happens ~ Jim Ellis.